be more understanding

give someone the benefit of the doubt,

never jump into conclusion too soon.

I was involved in some exchange of words with someone I knew for just a couple of months.

For as long as I knew him, he has always been looking for tenants to share his 3-bedders apartment.

First, he kicked a couple out of his apartment because they were a HORRIFIC couple and he felt threatened living with them.

The last I heard was, he has found tenants to fill up the rooms. Good news.

A month after that, I needed a place to move to, so I dropped a message in a group chat, in a bid that someone might know of someone who can take me in.

About 4 days after I dropped the message, I received a text from an unknown number.

There was no mention of my name nor any introduction from his side.

I chose to ignore. 

And here goes the rest of the story...

And no, I don't "post nice messages, invites, etc" in the group. Out of courtesy and being responsible, I only respond to people's invites to state if I can or cannot make it to their random gatherings. Hahaha. Yes, perhaps that's what he meant by 'nice messages'. I take it as a compliment.

And then, he was being sarcastic when I showed hints that I might know who the heck he was. Would he be better off if I treated him like a stranger?

To be honest, if that's not an accusation, tell me what is it? 

And when people apologised, the least one could do is to acknowledge that an apology has been put forward. What did he mean by 'if you don't feel like apologising'?

It's more like if you don't feel like accepting the apology, that's okay for me. I've done my part.

Yes. I should expect no one to know from head to toe of what's happening in my life. Hence, if you don't know what people are going through or have gone through, don't jump into conclusion too soon. Worse still, you have to confront and end with a rude accusation.

Just as I don't know what happened to the NEW tenants that you've found to fill up your apartment (that you have to be looking for tenants AGAIN), I can't accuse that you're such a bad landlord that the turnover in your apartment is as high as anything one could imagine. 

Understanding and tolerance don't come easy. If you want to be understood and tolerated, please be a good role model yourself.

I don't think he accepted my apologies nor has he forgiven me for not responding to his 'unnamed' message. 

I shall forgive him for not forgiving me and not accepting my apologies. 

To prove how dodgy is Gumtree nowadays, this is a profile photo of one of the weirdos who texted me from Gumtree.

p.s: Don't expect people to know who the heck you are if you don't introduce yourself and don't call them by name in your introduction line. DUH!

crosspath

to cross paths is fate

to walk on parallel lines is also fate

I came across a black Lexus three times in a span of one week at the same intersection, same position, and same set of lights.

Though the time I depart from home varies between 7.30 to 8am, I still manage to bump into the same car 3 times at the same location.

Given how busy the roads are at this hour and the infinite conditions that could affect the travel time on the road, how likely it is for two cars coming from different directions to be stopped by the same lights and at the same position - three times?

Timing is ............unexplainable.

who actually cares

one step at a time

This will be my 9th time moving house in 8.5 years, around 6 different suburbs in Sydney.

Tell me about how troublesome it is to move.
3 weeks notice to pack, organise moving and cleaning, decide where to move to, look for a new place, buy furniture, and now look for a suitable person to share the new place with, or otherwise pay $500/week.
All of these, while coping with a full-time job and a super-PMS admin.

My 10th move better be the last!

Ironically, the ones who are truly worried, offered help, tried to help, and helped, are not the ones closest to me. They are also not the one I spend most of my 'fun' time with.

When there is fun, a bunch of people would show up. When there is problem, only a handful show interest in your problem. Some even think it's funny to joke about it.

When in difficult situation, there are 3 types of people we encounter:
- those who put you in the situation
- those who helped
- those who did nothing or turned you down

Each of these people play a role in educating and making us a better person.
Forgive the first type.
Thank the second type and always be grateful to them.
Say 'it's ok' to the third type; perhaps we don't deserve their help but they still deserve ours.

This time around, it lets me see clearly if I do, never did, or will always be a matter to someone. Thanks to the very few who takes my problem as theirs just so I know I'm not in this alone.
Friends who are there during difficult times are worth keeping.
Friends who only show up during fun times are just as good as strangers.
I don't need so many strangers in my life really.

At the meantime, I shall remind myself: 'If money could solve a problem, it is not a problem anymore'.

Thanks to Dad for this simple slogan which makes every problem seems so small.
Inevitably, money can solve all of the 'problems' associated with moving as listed above.

This is one of life's many challenges - putting my perseverance and friendship to the test.

This too shall pass.

back-stab

忍一时风平浪静，退一步海阔天空

One of the simplest approach to a peaceful life is not to interfere with the life or practices of others. 

In other words, leave things/people alone when it's really none of your business.

And if you really can't help but have to voice it, don't use the back-stab approach.

Today's one of those days when I feel like I could win a wrestle with a bull.

I'm like a lioness on guard, ready to pounce.

But the better of me reminded myself to stay calm and composed, I'll be the bigger person today. 

So the admin wrote an email to my leader indicating:

Has she cleared her desk?

1. Her desk is like a garbage dump.

2. I cleared 4 dishes from her desk last weekend and put them in the dishwasher.

3. Office is a place for work and not for cornflakes.

4. blablabla...

The leader did not know how to respond to the admin and did not know how to pass the message on to me so he showed me the email instead.

He certainly underestimated the 'fire' in me. LOL. 

Sleeping volcanoes are the worst when they explode.

So I asked him:

Is there anything to do with her if my desk's messy? 

No wonder the glasses were missing on Monday. I did not ask her to clear that. Why was she removing things from my desk? Why is she complaining after doing things which no one told her to do in the first place?

And what's wrong with having food under the desk? The 'cornflakes' are less of a hazard than the drawers and backpack you guys have under your desk. 

Can't she tell me herself? What's with this email?

He replied: It's ok. It's ok. If that's what she wants......

Very quickly, I threw all the papers (wanted or unwanted) into the paper bin. Food into the drawers, stationery into a paper bag. What's left on the desk now is a keyboard, mouse, glass of plain water, calculator, and a desk phone. Let's see whose desk is more like a dump now. Wtf.

To respond to the 3 points above:

First of all, please be more ethical and not bitch behind people's back especially in a 'professional' working environment.

1. Please have some 'respect' for others and use appropriate words in professional environment. A MESSY desk is not a garbage dump. Does it stink? If it did, does it matter to you given that you're 10 metres or so away. Mine your own business. Do only what's on your job scope. I'm sure it doesn't include 'making sure other people's desk does not look like a dump'.

2. Did you ask permission to remove my 'dishes'? I haven't even raised questions as to why the two glasses of plain water miraculously disappeared over the weekends. PLAIN WATER. Not any food or 'dishes' as you claimed they were. ETHICS 101: Don't touch things which don't belong to you and not on your desk.

3. Office is a place NOT JUST for work. And to correct you, I haven't had cornflakes in decades. See clearly before you start accusing blindly. If I may say, office is also not a place for you to blend your whatever diet juice in the kitchen. Blenders are for home.

And after cleaning, the leader said thanks for cleaning up.

I looked at him from the sides of my eyes and told him: Ya...she better not come near me now, I'll bite.

He then told me, 忍一时风平浪静，退一步海阔天空. Haih, maybe I shouldn't have shown you the email.

Me: If I didn't 忍, I would have confronted her for what she did. Thanks for showing me that email, otherwise I wouldn't know why she was acting funny when I saw her in the kitchen yesterday.

I'll be a forgiver today.

Thanks for the opportunity to train my patience.

sisters

sister is the guardian angel for life

They're the ones who know me inside out, head to toe.

They bear with my weirdest behaviour, lamest jokes, and utter randomness.

They endure my worst farts, worst temper, and silent treatment.

They are the reason how I developed the free and easy habit of leaving home with no cash in my pockets because they have cash in theirs.

They have the best ears (or eyes) when I need to complain just about anything.

They let me be myself without being afraid of being judged.

They are there when all things fail.

We are each other's strengths during the toughest times in life.

We are each other's antidote when one's poisoned by irrationality or overwhelmed with enmities.

We hated each other's bf before because he has taken some of the attentions which belonged to us.

We'd ditch our bf for each other because bfs are 2nd class citizens, sisters are 1st.

We share the same love for cleanliness and tidiness but at times the room could be in a complete mess until someone implodes and starts banging things around, the other will start cleaning obediently.

We share one wardrobe. One size fits all. Though I have the smallest boobs, feet, arms, thighs...=P

We sometimes type in the worst grammars, typos, broken english, and caplang language but there's no problem in understanding each other.

We can communicate through eye contact, body language, and facial expression.

We don't back stab each other, we stab from the front.

We'd walk in the room in our undies, who cares who's undressed and who's fat.

We are careful with our spending but when it comes to spending on each other, we become careless. When I see how others are being calculative with their siblings; down to the cents, I can't help but to feel grateful and thankful for having the most generous sisters one could ask for.

We tell each other the darkest secrets for we know it's the safest place and we won't be judged against.

We compliment each other in many different ways - like how I tend to break the needle of the sewing machine and tangle up the thread in it, they'd fix it up for me. How they freak out at a cockroach, I'd 'settle' it for them. How every piece of pork that big sis hates, ends up on my plate. How all the tofu puffs in the bahkuteh pot, end up on younger sis' plate.

We are made for each other as one is a control freak and one is a follower. I'm the 'whatever, leave me alone'.

When one of us got into trouble, the others would stand up and save the situation.

When one of us needs money, we would say 'Here, take my money'.

When one of us falls down, we'll laugh it off before helping her up.

And so so so so so much more........

Love them to the moon and back! Hugs and mwah!

If you ask if I would replace a sister for anything else in the world, the answer is No, for sister is the best 'thing' ever.

For people who don't have sister, you could still find one in your bestest friend. As people say, best friend is the sister God forgot to give you.

I'm also grateful to have a few of these 'forgotten' sisters in my life.

Suddenly feel like I'm the luckiest person on Earth. :)

guardian angel

just when you think no one's there, someone's watching over you

Last week...
Halfway through work, I took a look at my dear plant and realised.....it looks different.
I examined it closely for a moment to find that it has REAL scar.
Then I lifted the pot and found water vapour beneath it.
Then the pebbles started to look like they've grown bigger and gone loose.
Then the pot seemed to weigh more than before.

W.E.I.R.D.

I looked around to check if someone's actually playing a prank on me.
Everyone was concentrating on their monitor...
I looked at the plant again.
I needed a second opinion on this weird discovery so I invited my senior to come look at the plant.

Me: Do you think it looks REAL?
Senior: Huh? No. Ann said it's fake.
Me: Sure? But it looks real...today. See the scar.
Senior: Haha. No. It's fake. Ann said it's fake. She told me.
Me: It looks REALLYYY real. See hereeeee....

He looked at it very closely.

Senior: But it's rubber. See....(trying to break a leaf)

And the leaf broke!
We both got a shock. Hahaha.
Our eyes were popping out.

Senior: Oh no! Sorry I broke it. Poor thing.
Me: I thought it was fake?
Senior: Ya. What happened?!

And then a 3rd person said...'I think Derek did something to it last night.'

Me: Oh? You saw him coming around here?
3rd: I think so. Yeah.

Ok. That explained everything. Haha.

To add to the irony, we didn't realise it's a completely differently plant and species. We thought it was the same old fake plant with a new 'real' look.

Today, I was told that the manager specially ordered two real pots for me and another lady in the office. He secretly replaced the fake one.

Thank you very much. It makes my Happy Day. :)