lessons to learn

everyone is our life teacher.

During the team lunch, our 34 year-old engineering manager was asked about the million dollar home he bought two weeks ago. A humble and low-key person he is.

Here are some of his thoughts for sharing (in blue):

- It's a good area with a number of good schools there. There's a national park behind our backyard, nice neighbourhood, peaceful environment. 

- I was thinking if I never do it now at this age, it would get harder in the future. I'd probably not buy anything in the end. It's now or never.

- The key is to start young. 

- I started with a one-bedder before I sold it for a small house. And then I sold the small house for this one, which I wouldn't be able to afford otherwise.

I couldn't agree more with him.
He has moved from a mediocre suburb to a hippy upbeat suburb, and now to a prestigious suburb in Sydney's north, at the same time every time he moved, the size got bigger.
Start small and low, one day you'll get somewhere.

It's like how snowballs are made. We start from a mini palm-sized snowball and roll it until it gets to the size we want and to where we want to place it.  

Many youngsters these days would eliminate this 'rolling' process because they have their parents to pay for the big snowball located readily at where they want it to be.
Not everyone is born with such luck, including myself. Hehe.

The size, location, and other tangibles of the house may impress people for a bit but it's the stories of how you get there and what you've been through before getting there that will make a lasting impression.

While we were all digesting his words, there were a few seconds of silence till he said:

Funny how our priorities change over time.

Priorities - something I've been thinking about quite often recently.

When that sentence was uttered; if we were animation characters, he would be the noble psychic and I'm the ordinary girl with popping eyes and standing hair like Can he read my mind?!?! Haha.

Back then, we bought the house in Annandale because we wanted to live near the local cafes, the bars, somewhere not too far from the city. But after the kids came, Nah...who cares about cafes anymore. Lol. We just move on..... 

Move On - something which puts me at where I am today - new job, new place, new friends...

Priorities gives us a better sense of purpose and direction.
Move On gives us the courage to leave our existing state behind.

Funny how the things he randomly talked about kinda hit the right spots like in an acupuncture therapy.

Apart from his humble and soft-spoken personalities, another thing I admire about him is that he drives a uber old Toyota-Whatever (don't even know which model it is - must be at least 20 years old) which belongs to his mum-in-law. I sat in the backseat of the car, with biscuit crumbs all over the seat and bottom. It's window controls are broken and the back tyre suspension gives a freaking creaking noise. For a moment I thought when we get back to the office, there might be only 3 tyres left. Lol.

How many people in their late 20's to early 30's would consider driving a 'scrap metal' on the road while investing on assets?
Most would rather drive a fancy European car while renting in expensive suburbs.

It's not the old car which impresses me. It's his humbleness and mentality to plan ahead.
A driver of a $1000 borrowed car, owns a million dollar home in Pymble, and stays humble.

This is what makes a lasting impression.

monday joke

if the heart is good, everything else follows

Admin: I'm planning to go get Botox for my face.
Staff: Hey?
Admin: I say I'm planning to get Botox for my face, so I don't look angry all the time.
Staff: Oh, you sure it helps?
Admin: Yeh, I'll ask them. Maybe do it around here. (pointing at face)
Manager: You rather look 'surprised' than angry? Hahaha...
Admin: Ya I don't mind looking surprised at all, or stone-faced. Just not angry.
Everyone in the neighbouring cubes: *pretend it's not funny, don't laugh please*

Once a victim of her uncontrolled temper, I wished I had the courage to go tell her, 'It's not your face which is angry. You're just angry in general.'

Botox won't help.
It all comes from the heart.

Quote by Roald Rahl:

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

little living thing

hang in there buddy

My new living companion...

As we get busy with the hustle bustle of life, we sometimes forget to stop and breathe consciously. 

Sometimes, life gets tough and we lost our breath.

Sometimes, we question the reason for breathing.

Sometimes, people hope they could stop breathing.

As for this little living thing here...
No matter what day, what season, what weather, what time of the day, what environment, what love, what situation, and what mood it's in...

It just keeps breathing.

And continue to touch lives.

Does this sound like something you can achieve too?

Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks...they pass by so quickly. 

As monotonous as life could be, we hardly notice the little changes around us.

But changes do happen.

Rather than wasting time pondering on life's many imperfections, pay attention on the changes around us. 

Appreciate the present moment, it will never be same next.

My little buddy at work has been breathing well.

It's taller now, though a little pale.

But yeah, we just have to keep breathing - consciously.

Continue to touch lives in a positive way and life will be good on us.

driving test

everyone - the good and bad - plays a part in your success

Finally got my Australian Driver's Licence - after 8.5 years here.

I've put off the idea of obtaining a Licence for soooo long because:

1. There was no need for one.

2. The public transport is pretty convenient.

3. I don't have a car, why need a licence?

4. Licence was not compulsory for work.

5. Car is a liability, not an asset.

6. I hate the idea of sitting for tests.

Earlier this year, I went for a job interview - whereby 'driver's licence' was one of the requirements for the job. In order to be competent for the job, I took the theory exam prior to the interview to show that I'm 'close' to getting a license. LOL. I didn't end up getting the job though. 

However, my current 'new' job requires frequent site visits. 

I think sooner or later, my colleagues will hate to partner me to site visits as I can't share the driving responsibility. 

At some point, I have to stop being the female-engineer-who-doesn't-drive-herself-to-site-visits. Feels like a hopeless spoilt brat.

And since I've taken the theory exam, I might as well get the licence done. Driving Test is just a tiny fraction of all the challenges and changes that I've been through in 2015. Just face it and bring it on!

Few days before the exam, I went on a 2-hours driving lesson with an ahpek instructor - just to get some exam tips from him.

He's such an old school chap who raises his voice and puts blame whenever he can. 

You failed! 

You gonna fail!

Fail! You exceeded the speed limit!

Fail! Why did you stop unnecessarily?!

Fail! Too fast! If the examiner feels scared, you fail!

Fail! You didn't check the blind spot.

Fail!

Fail!

Fail!

Honestly, I haven't FAILED so much in my life until I met him.

What a traumatic 2-hours. 

After the lesson, I felt so lost and my brain went blank. 

The FAILED voices kept playing in my ears. Wtf.

Before an exam, the last thing you wanna hear is your teacher telling you that you're gonna Fail, Fail, Fail and Fail... =_="

The following day, I tried driving to work. Felt like a rookie on the road.

The ahpek's voice still lingered in my ears.

I became unsure of when and where I should check the blind spots, when to check for cars, when to start signalling, etc...

The ahpek has been yelling Fail! so frequently that I'm so used to him telling me if I fail or not, I lost the ability to decide for myself and became so fearful of failing. zZZzzZz

Sure enough, despite the 'Sure Pass' muffin from VV, I failed the test. 

Ahpek was right after all. Hahahha.

So what happened?

All good, except ONE fail item.

When turning right, the right front wheel accidentally went on the solid white line-marking.

Sweat.

The examiners should make a compilation of the Dumbest Ways to Fail a Driving Test - to show how they decide to fail people in the most ridiculous ways.

Did he fail me because crossing the line during exam means I'll forever be crossing lines?

If I didn't cross that solid line, I would have passed.

But does that mean I won't cross any solid line EVER in the future?

There ought to be better ways to test driving skills.

'Skills' are just a small contributing factor to road safety. 

What about the patience, the kindness, the generosity, the calmness, which would also impact the driver and other road users?

Anyways, the following week, I passed the test on second try. 

I thought I did worse than the first time. LOL.

- 2 mins into the test, I was speeding up to cross the lights when they turned yellow suddenly. I made a sudden stop, in time before the first white line. I thought I hear ahpek's voice screaming Fail! I immediately apologised to the officer. He replied, 'That's okay'. I'd prefer him to be nasty cos the nicer he is, the scarier it seems.

- When moving into a kerb side before a 3-point-turn, I went too close to the kerb and scratched the tyre rim. LOL! The officer looked funny. And I thought, Damn..fail again?!

- When I was about to overtake a bus, suddenly it has its signal on, it was too late to give way so I went straight ahead. Fail again???

After the test, I was already thinking of when, how, and where I should take the 3rd test. 

When he announced the results to me...

Officer: Please sign here. Congratulations, it's a pass today.

Me: Sorry? Pass? Really???

Officer: Yeah.

Me: Oh. I thought I did worse than last week.

Officer: Nah, it was a nice ride. You did well.

Me: Oh okay. Thanks. Still can't believe it.

Finally, mission accomplished.

Driver Knowledge Test - $43
Leaner's Licence - $24
2-hours lesson - $90
Driving Test #1 - $54
Borrow Ahpek's car for Test#1 - $120
Driving Test #2 - $54
Borrow Arl's car for Test#2 - $40
10-years licence - $324
TOTAL = $749!!! 

Didn't feel as broke until I saw this figure.

Thanks ahpek for your fail-lessons, arl for borrowing me your car and taking half day off, vv for letting me hijack your room for a night before the tests, the officer who insisted that the ride was 'nice' despite the jolt and 'excitement' I gave him, and Ching who was gonna swap shifts to send me to the 3rd test - which is no longer required now that I've passed the 2nd.

So many conditions put together, for this to happen - the miracle of Causes and Conditions.

Next, it's time for other more important 'tests'.....

job probation - passed

life is also about fulfilling other's expectations

Passed my 3 months probation - in a blink of an eye.

In the review, there were 3 of us in the room. Me, the leader, and the director (who interviewed me).

They have nothing to judge me against as in this 3 months, there was only ONE non-structural project for us to work on. Apart from that, the rest are non-technical stuff like the uncountable client CV's, client's induction modules, company's induction modules, sit-in for unnecessary meetings, unrelated site inspections, report templates, safety inductions, team meetings......

The team leader's remark was: You have an impressive CV. Just that we haven't got related jobs for you to show off your technical skills, unfortunately. 

I was then 'invited' to express my likes and dislikes of the company, its people, the environment, and anything in general.

If I were to be honest with them, I guess by the end of the probation review, I would be told to leave the company if I wish to. LOL.

Instead, I chose the 'professional' path, by saying 'All is good, I have no further comments.'

The director then asked if I'm going to complete my chartership programme anytime SOON.

What??!!!!! LOL!!!

My reply was No?

He: Why not??!
Me: Err...because there's no rush for it?
He: But. Don't you want to practise as an engineer?
Me: I am practising as an engineer now, even without the chartership.
He: Ohh. But don't you like what you're doing? Don't you feel passionate about it? It's engineering. There's so much to explore, so much interesting stuff.
Me: o.O (Hahahhaha. I know engineering is interesting. BUT. It won't get any more interesting by being a Chartered Professional Engineer, would it?)
He: Ok. Tell me what's stopping you?
Me: Nothing really. I'll get it done eventually, just that I wouldn't promise it'll be anytime SOON?
Leader: I think the first step is to get her to enrol as a member.
He: Ohh, you're not even a member????
Me: Haha. No?
He: Why not??!
Me: Cos it costs 600 over dollars and I don't use the benefits which come with it.
He: The company pays for it. You don't have to bear the cost, you know?
Me: I know. But it's still 600 dollars whether it comes from my or the company's pocket. I think it's a waste. The money can be used on other things. Plus, I can work on the chartership programme without having to become a member first.
He: It's ok. It's good for you anyway. And we are paying for it.
Me: .....
He: You can write one chapter a month if you want to go slow. It won't take long isn't it? Just a few pages for each chapter. Ok?
Me: T_T

Omg so naggy like a parent and keep assuring me that the costs will be paid for. Money is not my main concern. Grrrrrr.

I feel like saying 'Hey Dad, I know you have high hopes on me and you really love Engineering. It's been a part of you for over 40 years. I don't wanna disappoint you really, hence I'll do it and prove it to you.....ONE day. But what are we chasing after, may I know?'

Here I am, feeling contented with my current state of life, not chasing, not pushing, not stopping, not complaining.
All of a sudden, my boss came questioning me of my love and passion for my job and the need for further recognition in my career as an engineer.
He is an example of the old-school people who dedicate their whole life into doing one thing and be the best they can.
They preach 'love what you do' than 'do what you love'.

It makes me wanna cry. Haha.
Because he has such high hope on me, pushing me to achieve more, trying to cultivate engineering-passion in me.....
While all I have in mind is to keep life simple, reduce the need to chase, and slowly pace towards the finish line in a walking-meditation mode.
Haha. Very ambition-less I know.
Less is more, remember?
What a high contrast to the picture he has in mind.

Unavoidably, CPEng has now made it to my to-tick list because it is on someone's must-tick list.

Such is life...it's not all about me, myself, and I. 

kikki.k

how 'small' things remind you of people you care

Dear kikki.k,

You first caught my attention in The Strand Arcade in Sydney CBD. I fell in love with you in your White outfit and the Simplicity you portray. You never fail to amuse me with your Creativity. Your Thoughtfulness touches me in every possible way. 

I can't help but to praise you in front of my families and friends (again and again) - for your effort in keeping people's life as organised as possible, for reminding people of the importance of Gratitude, and for your Xmas gift ideas which saves me lots of time every year.

Tonight, you also reminded me of how close we are to 2016. It sends thrills down my spine, as I've just started to get a hang and obviously haven't had enough of 2015.

IT SAYS: "TOP THREE PRIORITIES: ALWAYS MAKE TIME
TO FOCUS ON THREE THINGS IN YOUR LIFE THAT WILL
HAVE THE MOST SIGNIFICANT LONG-TERM IMPACT. "

Your products remind me of my families and close friends. I'm always able to put a face (family member or close friend) to each product - whatever the product is, it's as if it has been designed specifically for them.  A very good example from tonight was your new 'Top Three Priorities' notepad. It only took me a nano second to put a face to it. The description which comes with it is such a spot-on, it puts a smile :) on my face upon reading it. 

I look forward to more surprises from you, kikki.k.


p/s: If kikki.k were a man, I'd do whatever it takes to make him my man. LOL!

studied too hard

the best lessons come through experience, 

not on black and white nor some fancy highlighters

While packing for the house-moving, I found some old notes from college and uni.

These are the reasons why I had a very limited social circle back in the uni days:

Write programming codes on notepads. I no longer read this language, unfortunately.

Don't ask me what these equations mean.
I may be able to answer you if it was 6 years ago, but not anymore now.

96% for a mid-session quiz. What a Nerd?

Fine, tiny, and tidy handwriting - 10 years ago 2005.
2015 handwriting is thick, squiggly, and messy.

All the colourful sticky notes for an open-book exam. Back in the kiasu days.

While rummaging through those notes, the voices in my head went:

- Wth did we learn this for?
- I think I was once a genius (wanna-be). Glad I'm 'normal' now. Lol.
- What's these equations about?
- Why didn't anyone ask me to Get a Life?!
- Oh wow! I admire the '6-years-ago-Me'. Full of enthusiasm to thrive and achieve the best (I'm just too contented to do anything now).
- What's the point of studying so hard? Not all that we learned are useful anyway.
- Back then, I thought I knew so much but they don't mean anything now, do they?
- If I could go back in time, I'd choose an easier degree, I swear.
- These complicated stuff are not for human. I must be an alien 6 years ago.

I flipped through every page and every folder in the box for one last time before dumping them into the bin. Can't help but feel remorse for them.

If there was a take-two, I'd say NO to Engineering.
It's complicated.
It's the example of spending a fortune to build a 20 bedrooms mansion when all I ever need is 1 bedroom.
After 6 years of completion, I look at the mansion in disbelief and wish I could have spent less amount of time, effort, and money for the same 1 bedroom comfort.

Not that I'm regretting it but I simply realised the beauty of simplicity and the art of 'less is more'.

Nevertheless, I do appreciate the 'more' that I have now though 'less' could also give the same amount of happiness and contentment.

Fortunately, I didn't take up Medicine or Architecture - they seem like a 20 bedrooms mansion which requires double the amount of resources. LOL!

spring 2015

no matter how long the winter, spring is sure to follow

first day of Spring 2015

I was 'commanded' to get out of the office comfort space for site visits.

From risking our lives standing behind steel barriers on 110 km/h highway, to walking on main streets of dodgy suburbs where we were told to be more aware of the people walking near/around us due to the high crime rate, to open bush lands where there could be snakes enjoying their last moments of hibernation.

Apart from the fact that I didn't like to be forced into doing things I don't agree to (as I don't think my presence on site today is necessary) and the reports that I have to prepare from the site visits, I enjoyed the day out. 

One of the perks of being an engineer, is to be able to get some sunshine, be with nature, and discover hidden beauties in no-man's-land - and get paid for it.

I shouldn't be complaining really.

green green grass on the other side of the world

somewhere in Campbelltown

One of the many reasons why I love and appreciate this country more and more each day is that you don't have to be on holidays, in Hunter Valley or Tibet to snap a panoramic photo like this.

Nature is out there for us to explore.

We shouldn't confine our eyes and minds to just the things we've seen and experienced over and over again.

This links back to my thoughts of late that we sometimes fail to notice how much we're attached to the comfort zone we're in that we forgot that there are so much more to life than the 'shelter' we're in.

There are so much more to Sydney than the suburbs we landed on when we first arrived in Sydney.
There are so much more to Australia than Sydney and its Eastern beaches.
There are so much more to what we think we know about ourselves and life in general.

2015 - a year which I experienced the most changes and stepped out of my comfort zone numerous times.

New job, new work environment, new friends, new neighbourhood, moving from east to northwest of Sydney, finally enrolled for a driving test, and so on.

4 months left of 2015. What's next?