in memory

time does not wait, does it

On Boxing Day...

Just when everyone's in the jingly and merry mood of Christmas, I received news that my school mate SL's mum has passed away.

She had been ill for the last one year, diagnosed with leukaemia.

Each time I make a trip home, we barely have chance to meet as SL is based interstate.
In my last trip home in November - to attend a friend's wedding - we finally met but I didn't manage to visit her mum.
I asked about her mum. In an optimistic tone, she said her mum's recovering.
She also told me about how they almost lost her early this year.

I reminded myself that I shall bring aunty some Australian fig when I go back in January (assuming all elderly loves fig and assuming she's on the path of recovery).
*For the last decade, I didn't realise Australia is famous for fig. It's time to repay what I've missed.

I remember sending this to SL.

Aunty saw it, laughed and said 'siaopo wy'.
She then told us to 'take some leaves, meet more guys. Everyday work work work....'
I thought since she could laugh at jokes and advise on how to meet guys, she should be genki.

The news of her passing came to me as a shock.
For a moment, I couldn't figure if the news was real or it's something which runs in my subconscious mind.

I thought of the figs which never will make it to her.
I thought of the last joke.
I thought of how she spoke my name.
I thought of how she might have suffered.
I thought of who should I pass on the news to.
I wondered if SL's fine.

I went to bed with these lingering in my head.

The next day, I wrote SL a text.
As usual, she sounded 'fine'.
I don't know how else I can help apart from feeling sorry.

Memories flashed back.

When we were in Form 4, we once had to bring chopsticks to school. I can't recall what was it for.
SL brought a pair of beautiful shiny silver chopsticks while everyone else had the cheap-looking plastic/wooden ones.
Right before the school bell rings, aunty arrived to pick SL up.
I saw her.
I put my hand out the window, waved to her while holding the pair of silver chopsticks.
She saw me first and then the chopsticks. Lol.
SL was given a long lecture at home after, because she took the chopsticks without permission.
It was all my fault as I flashed them in front of aunty's eyes. Lol.

After finishing high school, I came to Sydney and SL went to Ukraine for university.
Our summer breaks were 6 months apart from each other. We barely met anymore.
On one of her birthdays in Klang, I got my sis to buy some roti canai's and deliver to her house as a surprise.
It was more of a surprise for aunty to find the roti hanging on the gate.

These are some of the few memories made with her.

I'm blessed to have you in my journey.
Thanks for having me in yours too.
May you be in a better place, watching after us.

As much as I'll remember your cheerful face and voice,
I'll also remember this, 'take some leaves, meet more guys'.

Love,
wy

time flies

when you're too occupied with life

In the midst of disappearing from the blog, I moved. Again.

No, I haven't lost count of how many places have I lived in, in the last 10 years.
If it's more than two handfuls, the number doesn't really matter anymore. It's one too many.

My flatmate was gonna move into her new apartment.
If I kept the apartment that we were renting, I'll have to find someone to rent the 2nd bedroom.
The horrific experience living with a horrendous tenant was a wake up call for me.
If there was a choice, I will not go down the path of living with a stranger. Never again.

The period where I was busy packing for house-moving was also the same time I went for a job interview, resigned, and served my resignation notice.

Before I could even fully unpack, I travelled to Tokyo and Melbourne, then back and started my new job.

In a blink of an eye, 3 months have passed since I started the new job.
All is well with the new job and new apartment.

It's suddenly the last day of 2016!!!

career chapter 2 - end -

experience which gives the 'cider' taste stays for a long time 

Resignation tendered.

Contract signed.

In 4 weeks, I'll be finishing off with the 2nd company of my career life.

It was a short, bittersweet experience of 15 months. 

With every journey - good or bad - that we go through in life, we should get wiser, grow stronger, and gain something out of it.

Thinking back, because of this job...

- I moved out of my comfort zone in the eastern suburbs of Sydney - the place I called home for the last 8 years since arriving in Australia.
- I was exposed to and get to know a new side of Sydney - the north and northwest suburbs.
- I made some new friends due to the new geographical location that I'm in.
- I met a team leader who taught me patience and allowed me to show my skills due to his incompetencies.
- I made a few 'close' colleagues due to the small company size. We gossipped, we teased, we had timtam and popcorn time-outs, long lunches and tea breaks, we enjoyed the days out of office for site inspections.
- I became more approachable and accustomed to the small-talk culture because people are more closely-connected in small companies compared to when you have 250 people in a company, you'd have more acquaintances than friends.
- I kicked start my engineering chartership after 7 years, just because it was enforced upon us. I wouldn't have started it otherwise.
- I learned that startup companies could be a pile of mess even if they do have an established parent company.
- The 7 main things that keep people from quitting: money, career growth, significance, work scope, support, people, and environment. I only scored 1/7 for this company unfortunately.
- I had the opportunity to interview people, which allows me to experience interview session from the other side of the boardroom. Apart from skills and characteristics, FATE too plays a part in landing you the job offer.

That's about all I can think of for now.

Cheers to a more colourful journey ahead. 

city2surf

when there's a will, there's a way

After living in Sydney for almost 10 years, I finally became one of the 80,000 citysurfers this year. 

Running has never been on my tick-off list, what more a 14 km run.

When our company decided to sponsor the run this year, I thought if I don't do it now, I don't know when's the next time I'd come this close to being part of this event.

I signed up without hesitation, and thought I'll worry about the training later. Lol.

Everything has to start somewhere else it will never happen isn't it?

While most people at work were already 'secretly' training during lunch, I was falling behind.

Blame it on winter. Haha.

It involves a lot of mental and psychological strengths to just get myself to change into sports attire and go for a run.  

Since it requires so much 'mental and psychological' efforts from my side, it makes more sense if I'm doing it for a cause than to be training and running blindly.

Perhaps, I'll be more disciplined with the training if it's for a cause? Hehe.

I decided to raise fund for CanTeen - to help teenagers who have been affected by cancer in one way or another. 

Thanks to my fellow supporters, I managed to raise $612.25 on the night before the run!

It did make a difference.

On the day of the run, I arrived 15 mins before the start time. 

Had to use the toilet before the run.

With an event of 80,000 participants, I was 'surprised and not surprised' by the fact that the queue for the toilet was less than 10 mins, there was no queue-cutting scene, there was sufficient toilet paper and water in the portable toilet unit, and it didn't stink as I thought it would.

I was 'surprised' because the organiser and 80,000 participants managed and behaved well above expectations.

'Not surprised' because this is what you can expect from the people here.

The crowd was at a standstill before the start.

At 9.05 am, it started moving slowly towards the starting line. 

Along the way leading to the starting line, there were jumpers and sweaters laying around on the ground.

I thought what's wrong with these people.

Did they all forget their jumpers?

Did they leave their jumpers behind and were gonna come back to pick them up after the race?

It's not one or two, it was more than 20!

Up to a point, there were a couple of huge plastic bags filled with clothing.

Massive task for the lost-and-found crew - I thought. Lol.

After moving slowly with the crowd for at least 15 mins, there's finally enough room for people to start jogging. 

But it was still pretty tight. You could easily trip on someone's long legs from behind.

The crowd dispersed after about 1 km into the run.
That's when I started noticing people in costumes.
There were superheroes, frogs, bees, bunnies, people who dress like old grannies, people in tutu dress, etc.
They were having so much fun dancing and jumping around with music blasting in the background.

Wonderwomen!

Couldn't help but to stop and take photos of these Wonderwomen. 

Couple in mix-match stoking and a daddy taking his toddler for a fun-stroll.

This guy in football jersey, with handbag and umbrella. 

Apart from cool and funny people, there were also weird people.
Like this guy with handbag and umbrella.
Looks like he's on his way to get some groceries.

Nova FM cheer zone

There were live bands and music stations scattered throughout the 14 km.
People blasting music from the balcony of their home.
Kids setting up mini fundraising stalls outside of their homes - selling cupcakes, energy drinks, and bottled water.
People helping to spray water on runners, from a hose outside of their home.
People from around the neighbourhood bring their kids to be part of the supporting-crowd.
People having BBQ in the lawn of their house with beers while cheering on the runners.

one of the last photos taken before finishing the run - reluctantly

14 km was over in a blink of an eye. 

I wished it was longer. Haha.

my 1st ever medal from running.

My target was to complete the 14 km in under 2 hours.
Clocked in at 1 hr 48 mins - including 118 mins of running, time spent taking photos, grabbing and gulping litres of drinks, applying sunblock (4 times), distributing sunblock, etc etc.
Most of my colleagues did it within 90 mins.

I later found out that it's common for people to donate their unwanted clothing at the starting line.
The jumpers on the road were 'act of charity'. Not that people were forgetful. Haha.
My colleague donated a bag of clothing too.

These are some of the thoughtful plans/services provided:

Free public transport for the day for all City2surf participants to ease traffic congestion.

Free sunblock and vaseline at the emergency booths throughout the run.

Sufficient toilets - cleaned and replenished frequently.

Gear drop service which transports participants' belongings to the finish village.

All you need to carry with you are mobile phone, an ATM card, and house key.

Don't even need earphones for music as there were music and live bands in the background throughout the run.

Something they should improve on is to come up with ways to minimise the number of cups used.

If each participant used 10 cups, there'll be 800,000 paper cups disposed in one event. 

Feel like crying for the earth. :(

Nevertheless, kudos and many thanks to the organisers, sponsors, volunteers, supporters, and relevant authorities for the success of this event.

City2surf is not just a mini-marathon. 

It encourages people to run for a cause.
It brings people together - runners, families, supporters, volunteers, party-goers.
It turns the otherwise busy and congested streets into a party zone.

It makes an ordinary Sunday healthy and meaningful.

I got home with a medal, jelly legs, sore muscles, blisters under my feet, and blood stain on my sock.

The S Health app shows 31,746 steps, 26.04 km, and 1265 kcal burnt.

Was expecting sunburn but I wasn't even tanned. The free woolies sunblock at the emergency booths work wonders!

I kinda understood now, the true purpose of marathon.

Not much for the medal and social media attention.

It's more about the satisfaction and sense of achievement at the end of the run.

The feeling of completing an impossible task. 

Of breaking and pushing through the limits.

quarter-life crisis

first-world problem

25 was when quarter-life crisis struck me for the first time.

Being new to the workforce with much more to learn from the veterans...
Having savings which allow me to be jobless for a year or two but not enough for anything bigger...
Being surrounded by friends whom I knew for less than 4 years and most were still in uni...
And being in a relationship which I'm not sure of its future...
Basically, everything's not here nor there.

Hence, came the doubt of whether I'm at the right place at all.

The questions which came across my mind were:

Do I like my job?
Is this what I wanna do for the next 10 years?
Do I follow my passion or continue doing what I'm doing for the sake of making a living?
What's my passion?
What are my life goals?
Where would I be in 5 years?
Where do I want to be in 5 years or 10?
Am I mixing with the right circle of friends?
Should I expand my network, mix with a more mature bunch?
Should I move back to be closer to my family?
Have I made full use of my life thus far?
When should I settle down?
What do I do with my savings?
Is it too much to dream of buying my own property?
How and when do I wanna retire?
Am I happy where I'm at?
Is life all about earning, living, saving, repeat?
If I die tomorrow, does anything still matter?

There were good and bad days.
I'd see my boss work till 7pm and wonder is this the life I want.
I'd look at my colleague who leaves at 5pm sharp to pick up his kid and shudder at the idea of settling down and having kids.
I watched the sushi-maker at a Japanese shop make sushi and thought maybe I'd be happier and more stress-free with a hands-on job like this.

Some days I'm grateful for my engineering job and the money it pays.

Some days I think it's meaningless spending 12 hours a day (including travel time), 5 days a week on work.
Some days I'm proud of my job and the difference it brings to the wider community.
Some days I'd think maybe going back to Msia for good is a better idea, some days I'd be like better not.

It's a constant never-ending cycle; until the mind is determined to get itself out of the cycle.

So I decided to take 3 months break.
Away from work.
Away from relationship.
Away from the confusing environment.
Went on a backpacking-style holiday to Hanoi.
Took care of my newborn nephew.
Did nothing for the rest of the break.

After 3 months...

I decided that I shall go back to being an engineer because it's a better-paying job than a junior sushi-maker. Just joking Lol.
The aim was to save more money, at least financially prepare myself for future endeavours. Perhaps retire by 40?
I also thought I should live more like a working-adult and less like a student to 'feel' belong and more connected to the life of a mid-twenties.
I shall also pay more attention to national and world news/info which I should be concerned of: taxes, property, finance, politics, budget, health, etc. Knowledge has to grow with age. Otherwise, it's called being ignorant and living in denial.

I stopped doubting my career path.
I had an aim with my savings.
I became picky with friends.
Invested more time on the right people and less on the not-so-right ones.
Sydney will be the place to be. Unless circumstances change in the future.
Most of the my doubts were answered and direction set.

5 years on...

30 was when the crisis struck me again.
This time at a different level, not as serious as before. Lol.
My career path is kinda fixed.
There's no more questioning about passion and interests.
There is a balance of young immature friends, fun and happening friends, stable and successful friends, and long-term trustworthy friends.
And also some friends/ex-colleagues/colleagues from work.
Settled with one property.
I couldn't have asked for anything more.

The questions are now:

Am I progressing well enough in my career?
Should I bother being a chartered professional in my field?
Would I stay long enough in this field to make the chartership worthwhile?
What do I do with my savings?
Who should be my beneficiaries?
What other things - investments, small business - can I venture in?
Can I retire by 40?
Have I spent the last 30 years well? Could I have done better?
What can I do now so I don't regret at 40?

Hahaha.
Perhaps I think too much but it's good to know I'm not the only one.
It's a common first-world problem.
The ones who think will get somewhere, the ones who don't will stay put forever. 
The way to get over it is to face the questions, find answers for the 'why, what, who, how, when', and execute upon them.

If we know how to drive, and there are roads to travel on, rest assured that we'll end up somewhere.
Those who refuse to learn how to drive and refuse to pick a road, will hence stay where they are for good or worse.

I know how it feels like to be doubtful and doubted as I was once there myself.
One advice to people who have symptoms of this crisis is, gratitude.
Counting blessings and recalling the things you're grateful of are ways to remind you that you're already doing well and you're good where you're at.

seize the moment

don't take moment and opportunity for granted

Within a couple of weeks, I've heard news of people's loved one passing away due to heart attack/stroke. With no warning nor goodbye. Three of them.

They reminded me of how unpredictable life is and how chaotic it could be at times. 

And then this quote came along.

The women, concerned of the amount of calories they consume, waved off the dessert cart.

For they thought they'd have chance to come back to it another time - dessert can wait - the ship then sank. 

Such is life. 

Seize the moment.

As now, then, and later won't ever be the same.

As now is now, then is past.

As later is a product of now. 

Moment - seize, reminisce, and not freeze.

money vs friend

only lend money to friends if you don't mind not getting it back

Money is a sensitive issue.
It has the ability to ruin, rock or make relationships complicated.
That's why people often say we shouldn't make money an agenda when it comes to relationship with people - be it family, friends, or your significant other.

How much do you have?
How much do you make?
Would you lend me some money?
You still owe me 50 cents.

Also because of its complicated nature, money can be used to gauge how strong is your relationship with another person or how much you trust each other. The stronger the relationship, the more you won't see money as an issue between the two of you. You're more willing to reveal/sacrifice without a second thought.

Recently, I have a friend who asked if he could borrow $600 from me.

$600 is a fairly small amount to borrow for 'emergency'.

$600 can also be easily cashed out from a credit card or overdrawn from a debit card.

Why would a professional with a permanent full time job not have $600 in his bank account?

Why just $600? And why me?

What if I didn't lend it to him and he ends up in a bad situation?

What if he really needed this badly?

When asked what happened, he refused to elaborate.
'Something came up suddenly, but nothing serious.'

I respect his privacy but don't I deserve to know what my $600 is for?

I asked a couple of trusted common friends about what they think about borrowing $600 to this friend of ours.

One said he doesn't mind borrowing but he wants to know what is it for.
One said no, because of past bad experiences of lending money to people.
Fair enough.

I could have asked a few more friends but I decided it might be bad for his reputation. It should be between the two of us to start with.

Eventually, I lent it to him.
I also prepared myself for the worst, that I might not be getting the $600 back.
If the worst happens, it's a $600 lesson of Don't Borrow Money to Anyone. Once and for all.

Someone who has the courage to ask for $600 without the slightest thought/respect that people ought to know what their money is gonna be used for - is quite a disrespectful person, in my opinion.
Just because I know better to respect you, doesn't mean you can take advantage of it and put me at a disadvantaged position. It's like taking a friend for granted.

On the other hand, I offered to help a friend who's been behind on credit card payment.
=_="
No, I'm not filthy rich.
I just wanted to help a friend pay less on credit card interest.
Although the amount is more than $600, I didn't need a second thought as I'm certain I'll get my money back. I've got nothing to lose.
This friend also has nothing to hide so I'm clear of what I'm paying for.

For the one who took the $600, this will be the first and last time.
Besides teaching me not to lend money to anyone, it also taught me that it's hard to trust someone who doesn't trust you in the first place.
Never ask for help if you're not ready to be naked with your stories; it only leaves people with more doubt about you and your personal values - that you aren't an honest person.

Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more. The money or the friend.

So, he who borrows money from a friend and doesn't bother explaining himself, must have valued the money more than the friend?

I'm glad that I'm at a position which allows me to help them financially.
It's a blessing to be able to help.

awanmulan

deep conversation brings you closer to one another

Spent a night with my girl friend at Awanmulan in Negeri Sembilan during my short trip back to Malaysia.

Why Awanmulan?

So my dear friend threw me a list of 9 retreat places in Malaysia, and told me to pick one.

There are all over the peninsular. Pahang, Penang, Selangor, KL, Negeri Sembilan. 

Selangor and KL are out because that's too close to home. Lol. 

Pahang and Penang are kinda too far. 

Out of the 3 options left for N.Sembilan, I randomly chose Awanmulan. 

She went like, 'Ok. I'll book it tomorrow.'

We are similar in a way where we dislike being dilly dally on our decisions. We tend to decide promptly and let 'come what may' take care of the rest. 

So when the owner Mr.Teng asked how did we come about Awanmulan, did we hear from family/friends/news/blog?

I said we saw online and picked it randomly. Haha.

entrance which looks kinda dodgy.

The road leading to the estate is narrow and seems to fit only one (non-standard) traffic lane at a time. Fret not, cos Malaysians are known to be able to survive any road/traffic conditions - especially traffic jams and flooded roads. Lol. One-lane road is just a small potato.

It's only about 1.5 hours drive from Klang Valley area. 

We arrived about 2.30pm at the gate. 

The gate was locked. The 'guard house' was empty and looked creepy. Haha.

After a few missed calls, Mrs.Teng finally picked up the call. 

Apparently, you would be asked to describe the 3 signs on your right before they come down to unlock the gate for you. 

3 signs - Dusun, Cabinz, and Shorea.

Being a Tuesday, we were the only guests that day.

Mr.Teng happily showed us around the different cabins in the estate. 

He is one proud father whose architect-son designed all the cabins in the estate. 

We didn't have our phones with us during the introductory 'tour' so no photos were taken. What a shame.

We booked the Sasterawan for RM550 a night.

There was supposed to be wifi provided but I couldn't locate any during our stay.

But it's ok. 

Wifi isn't one of the reasons we came here for. 

Phone network was pretty unstable too - duh otherwise it wouldn't be called a forest right. Haha.

Room wasn't air-conditioned but ceiling fan was provided.

Being in the middle of a forest, the night air was cool so you don't really need an aircond.

I wouldn't even use the ceiling fan if I were on my own - but I guess my friend would suffocate without it. Lol.

the bed

Very clean toilet and shower.
Towel, sarung, and shower gel were provided.

For ladies especially: no hairdryer.

the toilet. wallpapers are from magazine/newspaper cuttings.

open-roof outdoor shower.

This is where we chill, cook, eat, and dance with the insects after dusk.

the verandah

Forgot my swimmers!

Since there were only us that day, Mr.Teng allowed me to go into the pool with sarung. 

He also humorously said, 'Make sure your sarung don't float up when you jump in.'

Hahaha. Ok noted, uncle. 

Please make sure you have your swimmers with you if you intend to swim.

Alternatively, you could join the hiking trip (at some costs) provided by the 'locals' of the forest. 

Of course, you'll need sneakers for that which we don't.

We dipped in the pools for about 3 hours until sunset. 

Dip. Not swim. Haha. The sarung will be floating everywhere if I swam.

There were mosquitoes everywhere, even when we were in the pool. 

Involuntary blood donation of some kind.

the smaller pool

the bigger pool. hardly any blue sky in Msia.

the bigger pool

sunset from the pool

one of the cabins

garden outside the owners' home.

The cooking facilities were quite complete - induction cooker, kettle, microwave over, steamer, fridge, etc.
And also a mini BBQ pit, charcoals, fire starter, and matches!

The only things missing were the ingredients - BYO please.

Clean drinking water was also provided.

There were only two sets of everything - two bowls, two spoons, two forks, etc etc.

No chance of sneaking in an extra guest.

We were not supposed to move the furniture around. *woops*

But we wanted to have dinner the 'steamboat' way. So we shifted the table a little but also 'carried' it back to its original spot after. 

Yes. To protect the flooring, carry the furniture. Don't drag them. 

Don't expect 5-star housekeeping or whatsoever. Wash after yourselves.

Thanks to the dedicated housewife who thinks instant noodle is too saddening on its own.

Our supposedly camping-style instant noodle dinner turned out to be a luxurious korean noodle with kimchi, mussels, octopus, enoki, and oyster mushroom.

our dinner

After sunset, the insects come out to play.
They come in all shapes, forms, and colours. At least they don't bite nor sting.

Initially, we were busy shooing them away.
After a while, we got accustomed to it.
The insects are 'calmer' if you don't try to flag them off. So I decided to sit still and be treated like part of the nature. Lol.

  

   

The iron-housewife didn't forget fruits from the to-bring-list. Must salute her!

vitamin C booze

The surroundings were pitch black except for the light from our verandah.
In other words, you can't do much here.
You're partially disconnected from the outside world, with no wifi, and surrounded by nothing.
The only 'thing' that could possibly entertain you is the person in front of you - that's if you went there with a company.
We actually joked that if we spent longer time there, we might get too bored and end up fighting.

We spent the night talking and talking, sharing stories and views on life while the insects accompanied us through.

Breakfast was provided and delivered at 8am - nasi lemak with instant coffee, boil your own water.
Rice was too wet but we're not fussy on food. So it's ok.

breakfast

We checked out before 12pm.
Had a little chat with Mrs.Teng before we left.
She's nice and friendly.
She told us to visit each time I'm back in Msia.
Hmm. Need to do some budgeting before that. Lol. It's not the cheapest place for a short getaway.
But I must admit, we did spend quality time there.

The first thing we did when we were out of the forest was to head to a saloon and have our hair washed and blown dry.
It's totally the housewife's idea though I'm starting to feel uneasy with my not-so-fluffy hair too.

Then we headed to Seremban for some beef noodles.
Nothing so special about it, except for the price.

RM8 for a bowl of clear soup noodle with beef.
RM8 for 10 beef balls which didn't taste beefy at all.
RM6.50 for a mini pre-packed coconut!!!

RM33 for this meal.
OMG!!!

And I thought bahkuteh was the most expensive meal. I was so freaking wrong.
I had to demand for a receipt with the breakdown of prices to be sure that we pay for the right items.

Seremban clear soup beef noodle - just noodles with beef slices, some shallots, and chilli sauce.
I repeat.
Clear soup with noodles, beef slices, shallots and chilli sauce.
RM8.
And not tasty.
You made my jaw drop.
Not coming back and not recommending it to anyone.

quinn seremban beef noodles

Coin meter parking still exists these days - at where a bowl of clear soup noodle costs RM8.
Technology isn't picking up with inflation.

Then we went to get some siewbaos and egg tarts.

Apparently, the egg puff was the famous one. But the wait was too long so we decided to ditch it.

We then stopped by at the Majestic Hotel KL for hi-tea before going home.
Luckily, we had our hair washed and blown prior! Hahaha.
Can't imagine us walking in with greasy and sticky hair.

It was indeed a 2D1N well-spent.
We don't need it often.
Just need to do it once in a blue moon with the right person.
Thanks for your time and company!

at a random gallery

friends you can be silly with

We stumbled across this gallery while on our way to Central Park. 

From outside the glass door,

Me: What's this about? Oh no, the 6th guy has a broken penis!

L: Omg...eww....

Me: Let's go in and have a look.

L: Ok.

After a close look,

Me: Ok. It's not just the 6th guy, they all seem to have broken penis for some reasons. Lol!
L: Haha.

After a closer look,

Me: Oh no, actually they broke their own penis. What the hell...
L: Huh?!
Me: See the 2nd guy...he's holding the broken part. It seems like it fits just right.
L: ..........

L: Eh, nola. The 6th guy's is not broken, it's just short. Haha.
Me: Not broken? Hahaha. Oh ya...how come so short? Ok. Only the 2nd one is broken.

We were too carried away by the 'short' stuff and forgot to behave.
We also spoke at very audible volume. Woops...

Luckily, it was almost closing time so there weren't many people around.

If the statues were real, the guys must be real sad and embarrassed. Lol.

flu season

if only there is one less selfish person

I've always heard stories from colleagues about how often they fall sick because their kids fall sick because someone from their daycare/school was sick.

One even told me that someone from school passed the virus to his boys, who then passed the virus to him, who then shared it with his team at work. One by one, the team members fell sick. My first thought was 'you shouldn't even have come in when you're sick', let alone spreading viruses to a quarter of the people at work.

Just a week or two ago, a friend's daughter contracted the Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease (HFMD) which started from someone from the next class. And who knows where this 'someone' contracted the disease from. Why did the parents even send him/her to school knowing that he/she is carrying and has the potential of spreading some kind of viruses?

A friend told me she's having sorethroat and headache, but she stressed that her nose isn't runny so she doesn't think it was caused by virus. She thinks the sorethroat and headache were developed from her body internally. Sorethroat and headache are flu-like symptoms to start with. It's unlikely that it's not a viral infection (in my 'non-medical-background' opinion).

This is only one of the many times that she fell sick with sorethroat, headache, flu or fever symptoms. Sigh. Either she has weak antibody. Or she is surrounded by virus-carriers all the time. Or she is negligent to the causes of flu-transmittal. Or all the above.

Each time my toddler niece is sick, my sister will keep her away from the two nephews (or vice versa) to avoid spreading the virus to them. Virus could be passed on by just touching the same toys, sharing the same food/drinks, or coming in contact with saliva/mucus. Even during healthy times, saliva-passing should be kept minimal.

I know of a friend who falls sick every month. It's not just her, it seems like her colleagues fall sick frequently too. This is an obvious sign that the viruses are spread amongst themselves. Sick people should just stay home for a day or two or five!

Sigh.

The most recent conversation I had on viruses:

A: I can't eat ice-cream as my cough will get worse.
D: It's good. So you can officially take a sick leave tomorrow.
A: No. I'll still go to work.
Me: *zzzz*
A: I haven't taken any sick leave before.
Me: What?! But you've been sick so frequently. From memory, you have flu every now and then. You never taken a day off at all?! *wth?*
D: Wahlao.......you'll spread to other people leh.
Me: (exactly what I thought)
A: Hahaha. Ya I think so. I was coughing for a week and this morning my boss started coughing too. Hehe.
Me: (It's not funny, Hello???) Why don't you ever take a day off?
A: I'm doing them good. Giving them free flu vaccination. So they can fight greater viruses next time. 
Me: *it's getting too ridiculous, I don't even want to discuss it any further*
D: It's not just your colleague you're harming lor. Think about their kids, their family.
Me: Just take a day off and rest at home.
A: It's boring at home. That's why I'll still go to work regardless. 

I gave up trying to convince people like this.

People who think sick leave exists only for the sake of sick people.
People who think taking or not taking sick leave is solely for their own good.
People who have no consideration for other people in terms of spreading illnesses.
People who think viruses never spread.
People who think it's not their fault if other people contracted the virus from them.

The harder I try to 'educate' them, it only makes me seem like a paranoid and un-compassionate person.

No amount of brainwashing or nagging is comparable to self-awareness.
In the end of the day, only they can change their own mindset.
It's scary to know that there are plenty of 'unaware' people like this around me.
Haven't even taken into consideration, the ones who aren't around me.

Everyone needs to be considerate and educated about how not to spread diseases/viruses to innocent healthy people.
People don't need to fall sick just because you are sick.
Stay home, recover.
Spare the virus from spreading to others.
Or at least wear a mask, cover up when sneezing/coughing, sanitise.

This is just 'domestic' flu we're talking about.
I can't imagine if they have swine flu, bird flu, or ebola.
Would they still think it's okay for them to walk freely in public spaces?

monday mess

life gets messy sometimes,
in order to stay interesting

Decided to not 'race' to work today.
Left home at 8.40am for the 'walking meditation' to the station. Lol.
Stopped by Macq Centre to recharge the Opal.
Got in to work at 9.40am.

1. When I was making coffee, one engineer came in, asked about my weekend, thanked me for sharing the 'Better Place' to them, followed by 'I've completed A and B, when you're ready can you come around my desk to explain the next task to me.' I said Ok (but let me have my brekky, read some news and articles, and check my emails first? Haha).

2. As I sat down and checked my phone, I saw texts from the housemate who's moving out this Friday. She's moving out on Friday but only paid till Thursday. I was giving her kind reminder on the rent. She let go at me and called me RIDICULOUS. I hesitated on whether I should point out to her that there is something called 'courteous' in the English dictionary which we should use when dealing with issues and talking to people. In the end, I told her not to be cranky and be more calm and professional. Hahaha.

Halfway through, I decided to stop dealing with her as it starts to affect my mood for the day. Only got back to her after the day has wound down a little and I'm mentally ready to deal with her shit.

She gave up replying. Maybe I had too much facts which she can't win over. Lol. 

When she got home, we discussed in a peaceful manner, and she said sorry for being mean and harsh, and I'm not the only person she's mean to today. Well okay, not that I take your 'barking' seriously anyway. Thanks for training and putting my patience to test. I think I passed the test again.

3. I'm supposed to review some drawings and designs for issue by lunchtime. Found so many funny notes in the drawings, by the ex-team leader. Now that my name is going to be on the drawings, I need to make sure I don't look like a clown. The designer is working in another office which makes communication more difficult and slow.

4. Then this email came in, Subject: ACTION REQUIRED: EXPENSE CLAIM REJECTED.
The email shows that the sender is the accountant in the UK office. UK? What the hell?
So I hit forward to the accountant in Sydney and the IT guy who designed this crippled accounting system, and CC the Operations Manager of Sydney office.

As I was typing the email, the Sydney accountant turned up beside me and went 'Hahaha'.
Like wtf? Sitting next to me, laughing at my screen?
I looked at her and said 'Sorry, I'm pissed now, give me a minute I need to type this email.'

My email went "Can someone tell me what is happening here? Expense claims often get stuck in the cloud for ages and only to be informed that it hasn't been processed. Let me know where do I go from here. Thanks and Regards."

When I turned to the accountant,
Me: Yes? What are you here for?
Her: 'I rejected your 10 dollars claim.'
Zzzzz.
Me: Why? And why did the email has to come from the UK? *looking calm on the outside, but eyes rolling on the inside*
Her: I thought it was mistake. So I declined. But I ask M, he said it was right. So maybe you want to submit it again. That's not from UK, it's by the system.
Me: Why did you think it was wrong?
Her: I didn't know. I thought you shouldn't charge it to a Project.
Me: (that's the dumbest thing to say and do) *screaming in my lungsssssss* 
Her: Can you resubmit?
Me: Ok. I'll do that when I'm free. *roll eyes for the millionth time*
Her: Are you still pissed?
Me: Ya, kinda. It's a freaking crap system. Why does one claim have to go through 4 diff people, back and forth? That's the only thing he is paid to do here, and he can't even get it right. What is he here for?

Honestly, they should have paid whatever price for a 'healthy' system than paying this IT guy some ongoing salary for a crap system. Why does accountant have the right to reject claims which were approved by the Project Manager? It should be as simple as 3 steps: Submit. Approve. Pay.
And not Submit. Send On. Approve-1. Approve-2. Finalise. Pay. Shit system.

5. The engineer came back again cos I forgot to drop by her desk to explain her next task. In fact, I didn't forget, I haven't stopped since I got in. Ok. There goes 20 mins. And then another person came. And another one. I wonder why they can't pick up things on their own. If I managed to do it, I don't see why they can't. Not angry, just tired of repeating. :(

6. Because the admin did not come in today, I had to answer every freaking call and every freaking garage buzz for her. How many things can I handle at a time man? I was so annoyed with it that I sent out emails asking everyone to inform me if they are expecting guests to come through the garage. I will now ignore all uninformed buzz's.

7. A friend is visiting this week and I'm kinda packed. Thought I could use a little help from another friend to accompany this friend. But the first thing she told me was, I can only do Fri dinner or Sat dinner or Sun brunch. OR??? Ok. Not very helpful but that's okay. I'll put this aside for today cos my brain is getting too overwhelmed by now.

8. Then, the sampat girl in Msia text me to see if she could use my aussie address to get some swimming trunks delivered. It's for her husband's cousin's sons. BOYSsss. I was like what kind of trunks have to be specially bought from Aus? She said Funky Trunks.

So I had these funky men in funky trunks on my wide screen monitor while I typed the delivery address to her. Suddenly, the engineering manager came behind me. And went....'C, do you know where's Ann.............oh wow! What's that?'

=_=""""""

Me: Hahahahaha. Woops.
Him: Hahaha. *paiseh face*
Me: Hahaha. My friend's asking me to buy some trunks. (Omg. The dumbest reply ever! My 'friend' is a female, and the trunks are for BOYS, website shows MEN. I'm not actually shopping for trunks for a male. zzZZzzz)
Him: *trying to continue talking but keep getting distracted by the funky stuff*. Hahaha I'll pretend like I never saw it. *close his eyes*

I quickly minimised the browser while he talks. Lol.

9. And then, the unibuds club president text me to see if I can attend a meeting this Sunday morning, to share some experiences/knowledge or anything. Ahhhhhhhhhh. Can the day get any more exciting? Thankfully, I have a roommate who has met almost all of my friends. Lol. She agreed to accompany my visiting-friend on Sunday morning so I'm able to 'help' attend the meeting.

Left work at 5.30pm. Goal achieved!

Despite a longgggggg and somewhat taxing Monday, I believe the week will only get better. Hehe.

work to live

work to live

38 hours week + 200% efficiency

Now that the team leader is gone, I was requested to step up as the lead in the interim of them hiring someone with the right experience for the type of works we do. With the nightmare we went through with an incapable leader, they now realised the importance of right experience.

Over night, my scope of works now includes design reviews, give technical input, and attend meetings with the clients and project managers; at the same time managing and working on another project which dues in 2 weeks.

No matter how busy work is, I believe in working efficiently within the 'standard' working hours of not more than 8 hours spent at work (including time spent for lunch), maximum tolerance is 8.5 hours. Anything more than that, I'll feel like life is meaningless and I then need to throw a sickie to readjust mentally.

Whenever people ask what time can I make it for dinner (after work), I always say ANYTIME. Even if it's 5.30pm, I'll make it there. Working hours should be adjusted to suit personal commitments, not the other way round.

It's been a struggle to keep up with my no-OT philosophy lately. With deadlines, random meetings, and random tasks popping up here and there. Also suddenly been grabbed into a 1 hour interview and last minute meeting invites.

The alarm used to be 6.45am.
Then 6.30am.
Recently, it's 6 or 6.15am.

Finishing hour used to be BY 5.30pm. Then 6pm. Then 6.30pm.
Now 7pm seems normal.

Things only feel worse without Daylight Saving Time,
Catching the sun when it's at its meanest position - shining right in front of your eyes.
Missing the romantic sunsets.
Leaving the office only when the street lights are on.
Going home to junk for dinner because it's too late to make proper food.
And laundry is left out for half a week, and another 1.5 weeks in before it gets sorted and ironed.

This is UNSUSTAINABLE.

At the same time, the housemate thinks it's perfectly NORMAL to work 11 hours a day, regardless of the efficiency and the crap (or no) dinner after work. I could never understand this concept, until I recalled, she gets paid by the hour. The more inefficient they are, the richer they get. Oh well...

If I ever became a boss, I shall never condone working OT in my business.
Get your job done and get out of the office after 5pm. Shit. Don't bludge around and expect to get paid extra.

The lengthy working hours make me a lifeless fish on weekdays.
I only come alive after I step out of the office on Friday night.
So bad.
Life should really be 24/7 not 24/2.

When I left at 6.20pm on Thursday for a Birthday dinner, my colleague was surprised.
You leave early today!, he said.
6pm = early?
Should I be happy that I actually left 'early' or I should mourn cos I haven't left earlier than 6pm in a long time? :(
He then asked, Do you work to live, or live to work?
I startled.
My motto has always been eat to live, work to live.
Based on my recent records, it now seems funny if I told him I work to live.
So I said, I live to work for now, but it won't be long. And forced out a smile, while mourning inside.
It hits me at the right spot. I'm literally living to work now.

Goal set.

For the coming weeks, I'll work the normal 38 hours cos I want my life back!

chess

blessed to grow up without technology

Derek once told me, one decision he did right as a kid was to learn how to play tennis.

Being good at tennis was one of the reasons he didn't have problem settling in when he first came to Sydney as people always count him in for quality games. He was never left out on weekend tennis. And that's where friendships were made quickly.

I thought to myself, do any of my childhood hobbies actually enhance my life as an adult? I don't think so, no.

As kids, our 3 main 'toys' were Lego, barbie dolls, and chess.
Lego has probably sparked the 'engineering' side of me.
Barbie. I don't think it brings any benefit really. Her life objective is to dress up for dates with Ken. Such shallow mentality. Girls have better things to achieve in life. Lol.
As for Chess, after the topic was randomly brought up by my sis, now I believe it does play a huge part in shaping my personalities and way of thinking.

We used to represent our schools in chess competitions.
Not that I'm extremely good at it, there just weren't enough people to make up the team.

In a chess competition, there is one timer for each player.
When it's your turn, your timer runs. Once you completed your move, you stop your timer which then automatically activates your opponent's timer.
The game may end at any time if any of players' time runs out.
It's not just about trying to checkmate your opponent, it's also a race against time.

There's also the touch-move rule in chess. If a player touches a piece on the board during his turn, he must then move that piece during his turn. If he touches the opponent's piece, he must then make moves to capture that piece during his turn.

What is a chess game like?

- Plan and think ahead of not just your own moves but your opponent's moves too. 

- Observe your opponent's each and every move to find out his intentions and forecast his next move/game plan.

- Think before you act. Do not touch anything on the board until you're sure.

- You don't have all the time in the world to think or make decision as the clock ticks down.

- Every move should be strategised with purpose - to threaten, to trap, to lure, to kill, to defend, to distract, to slow, to run for life or to force the opponent into taking a certain move.

- Sometimes you have to sacrifice the less important (or least favourite) pieces to keep the 'useful' ones.

- Sometimes you kill for the sake of being killed. The less pieces there are on the board, the easier it is to have an overview of the game. 

- No talking, pure thinking, full concentration.

- Every time a move is taken by yourself or the opponent, you quickly repeat the what-if, if-not, if, and say-if in your head because the dynamic of the board changes with every move.

- You sit face to face with your opponent for about an hour but the only words spoken are Check, Touch-move, Castling, Checkmate, and Good-game. 

So what has chess instilled in me?

- 'One step at a time' is a good way to not over-stress on things but sometimes we gotta think and plan a few steps ahead to have a more 'structured' life.

- Observation is a good way to get to know someone better inside out - why they do/act/say/react in certain ways. We don't always need to ask or judge, just observe and learn.

- Never do/act/say/react on things before thinking through the consequences or alternatives. Touch-move serves as a good reminder.

- Think and make decision there and then unless the decision is dependent on other factors which are not within your control. The habit of not wanting to commit until the last minute is a form of running away from things. Time waits for no man.

- Always be reminded that each step taken in life leads to another. We might as well take the steps purposefully, making full use of the chance we have.

- You can't have best of both worlds. If it means sacrificing something to keep another, so be it. Know what's best for you, make choices, let go.

- Less is more. Trying to hold on to too many things will in turn blind us from the things that truly matter. The lesser we have, the clearer it is to identify and easier it is to grasp on what matters most.

- When I'm quiet, I'm thinking. And often, my thoughts are confined in my head and I'm used to not speaking out.

- Nothing is definite as things are meant to change as we go.

- Silence is not awkward. Some may find it uneasy.

Chess has definitely influenced me in many ways.

My analytical and critical thinking skills, my calmness in facing and solving problems, my observant nature, my habit of not lengthening any decision-making process (not liking to spend so much time thinking of the same things over and over again), my introvert traits, my habit of doing all the thinkings in my head and not voicing out, my ability to quickly let go of thoughts/things/people which/who aren't worth or not meant to be, and my love for quiet space. Also, people think chess is: Boring. Slow. Complicated to some. Brain-killing. Not fun. Perhaps that's why I'm a boring person at times. Lol.

Thanks to the aunty (I don't know which aunty) who gave us her spare chess set.